- You call your corners on a cellular phone.
- You’ve had to remove candle wax off your keyboard.
- You charge your ritual tools- with a Visa.
- You use a remote control in place of an athame.
- You download your Book of Shadows.
- You cast your circle in a chat room.
- Your familiar is a mouse.
- You attend ritual sky clad because it’s too much trouble to get dressed for a computer.
- Your Yule ritual involves defragmentation.
- Your altar cloth is a mouse pad.
- Your cauldron is a crock-pot.
- Your cone of power has a surge suppressor.
- Your magical name, e-mail address, and on-line name are all the same.
- If you end a circle with Ctl-Alt-Del.
- Your athame has a SCSI interface.
- Your OBE’s begin with a netsplit.
- Your ritual robes conceal a pocket protector.
- You calculate the phases of the moon with Windows ’98.
- Your altar has a keyboard.
- Your drawing down a circle is a POST (power on self test).
- You do most of your correspondence by email and sign off with Blessed Be.
- You don’t call it a ritual, you call it a Macro.
- You have ever attached ribbons to a May Pole using a staple gun.
- You invite the God and Goddess to come online.
- You keep a Disk of Shadows (with encrypted backups).
- You participate in online rituals more than you do FTF.
- You refer to eclectic ritual as cross-platforming.
- Your Beltane ritual includes more than one news group.
- Your candles have batteries.
- Your deities include Murphy and Gates.
- Your drumming is done on a CD player (pre-recorded).
- Your herbs are always mail-ordered (express, overnight).
- Your idea of a great retreat has a Computer City, electricity, and a TV nearby.
- Your incense is by Glade.
- Your magic wand is a laser pointer.
- Your magical writing is done in binary code or C++.
- Your pentacle is made of computer chips.
- Instead of asking what tradition someone comes from, you ask what operating system they run.
- Your coven is spread over a 12,000 sq. mi. area.
- Your Book of Shadows has a 6-digit version number.
- You refer to deities using 3-letter acronyms (ODN, LKI, THR).
- You do cord magick with ethernet.
- You ritually down your server for Samhain.
- When your quarter candles burn out, the UPS backup system kicks in.
- Erecting the temple entails formatting more than 4 disks.
- Casting the circle changes an (int) to a (float).
- Your Star Trek screen-saver signals when your meditation period is over.
- Passing the cakes and ale entails using a /me command.
- Your search for truth involves regular expressions.
- You draw down the moon using a light-pen.
- Your tarot cards multi-task.
- Your daemons collect news for you.
- Your crystal ball has a horizontal-hold control.
- You refer to solitary practice as a stand alone.
- You tap into the collective unconscious using a web browser.
- Your favorite deity has a homepage.
- The address of your covenstead begins with http://
- Your circle is a token ring